God, I’m Sorry

This is an honest letter from one of my readers…

Baby girl

Who would have ever thought that I  would commit such a  terrible disgusting and almost unforgivable act… if not for the mercy of God. GOD.. I don’t feel like I have the right to even mention his name.
He ought to be my father… but how will a daughter knowingly hurt her father to his own  face and then call him father when  she is  done.
He ought to be my best friend…. how do you  betray someone you regard as a best friend and think things will just return to the way they were or even get better.
He ought to be my all in all … all in all I say, the most important person in my life…the one who should come first in all I do and think of.. you know  I would say my goal in life is to make him look good .. but yet I have displeased him. I am doing one hell of a job.. such a joker I would describe myself as.. a Christian joker.  The devil must be having a  good laugh.
I  can’t even seem to deal or forgive myself, how do I ask him for forgiveness.
I  wish I could erase it but I can’t, I  wish I could turn back the hands of  clock.  He spoke to me .. I twisted it to suit my flesh!
I am foolish indeed… even after reading the book of Proverbs.  I still have in a way rejected the wisdom and  counsel of the mighty one.
Who am I indeed? Should I still call myself a Christian? A friend of God? His daughter? A virtuous woman in the making?
Or am I just a shame… a shame to all I have learnt and tried to uphold .. a weakling.
Is there any redemption for this that I have done .. or will I have to pay for it! How do I get the  assurance that indeed I have been forgiven?
In all even though I know I am unworthy and unfit .. please  help me God! I  can’t do this on my own. Help me! If you will.  I am sorry!

If anyone ever feels this way ever, just read Romans 8 vs 38-39

None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us. I’m absolutely convinced that nothing—nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable—absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us.”

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The Big Deal

 

a-grateful-heart

Its funny how lightly we take so many things as humans, an example

When you lose your sight, you are blind (that’s a big deal)

However we think it’s simply normal to open our eyes?

When you lose your hearing, you are deaf (that’s a big deal

However we think it’s simply normal to hear everything spoken to and around us?

When you ,lose your legs, you are lame (that’s a big deal)

However we think it’s simply normal to just get up and walk?

When you lose the function of your spinal cord, you are paralyzed (that’s a big deal)

However we think it’s simply normal to sit and stand straight?

Lastly, when you lose your breath, you are dead (that’s a big deal)

However we think it’s simply normal to take in breaths as we please?

 

I want to think by this point you get my drift, don’t overlook anything because things just happen to “work”

Give all glory to God, he deserves it.

 

The Driveby

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Dear Drivers,

You need to understand that just because Abuja has wide roads and relatively no traffic doesn’t mean you abuse the use of the road thank you,

Here’s my experience.

It was a beautiful sunny day in the capital, all was well with myself, and I was headed to my best friend’s house just at the peak of the noon.

My pretty top was giving me joy, my jeans were just the right measure of body hugging (ooh la la), my shoes were so comfortable I could sleep in them and I was all round excited that day, got in a cab (even if it was a bit overpriced, thank you fuel scarcity) but I thought to myself, nothing was going to ruin my good day, or so I thought.

Just 50 seconds to my destination, there is a car parked on the main road, its still on and I can see there is a human sitting in the driver’s seat, now that street is double parked as it is one of the few residential areas that has to deal with offices around it. The cab man honks signifying our presence as maybe his fancy BMW might not have a mirror with which we can be seen.

After the first honk, nothing happens, impatience gets to both myself and the driver because this young man is parked just on the street leaving us no space to get to my less than 50 second away destination.

So I thought to myself, why not just walk there since you are basically there, but even if I could walk the taxi man still had to wait for this insensitive human to get off the road, what was I going to do? Sit in the car and wait for this person to move or get out and rip him a new one so I did what any respectable person would do.

I got out of the cab and walked to the fancy BMW “Excuse me, you do realise you are parked on the road blocking others from moving forward when there is ample space for parking right ahead of you?”

He looked unshaken “I’m sorry I’m waiting for someone in the car next to me” making me look at the car beside his, I wasn’t having any excuses.

“Look you need to move your car before I call the mobile police on you this minute”

“By the time they get here I’ll be gone little girl” the gall of this human!

“Excuse me, little girl? You know what? Just get your car off the road, you have constituted a nuisance enough”

“little girl using big words eh, why don’t you run on back to school and finish that dictionary you were reading to impress people”

“I’d rather read a dictionary than be an insensitive, uneducated, backward  thinking primate like you, you sad excuse for a human” and with that I walked away, praying to God I didn’t get beat by this unknown stranger but then I had to think again did I go too far? Should I just have let it go then? Did I really need to respond to his taunt?

All this I thought of as I sat in the cab and adjusted my seat belt, waiting for the individual to move his car before I actually summoned the courage to carry out my imagination.

The feature picture is one of the deliciousness made by http://zeezytastebuds.com/ be sure to have a look see.

 

Filter for wah??!

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Dear Humans,

It is time we realized that not everything that we think in our head is worthy of outward representation.

We have decided to be so caught up in other people’s lives that now we believe we have a say, stake or even a place so much so that we decide to voice our opinions on issues of their personal value.

My momma taught me “if you don’t have anything good to say, then say nothing at all” the words of your mouth are all it takes to break down a house of cards.

What am I on about?  I recently read of the internet comedian who almost took his life due to the frustration he felt in the United Kingdom, although I do not support the decision of suicide, I do believe it was a cry for help and help he got from a number of people, but what’s got me pissed is the way some people have decided to respond to it.

Calling him a coward, saying things are harder for people in Nigeria and what not, that it was all a publicity stunt. Then I read this particular comment by a “christian” and the things she wrote would definitely make Jesus shiver on his throne.

Here’s an idea,If you do not feel empathy for the person’s problem  and so don’t understand their point, how about you keep your opinions to yourself then? you don’t have to add to their problems, you making any kind judgement based on your opinion of what should be does not make you any better.

Now, regarding the living in UK bit, because you are schooling in the UK doesn’t make you automatically better off than others in Nigeria, Yes it snows there, yes the wifi is nice but in all honesty the UK is like every other country where people work hard to get by, now as a Nigerian student living in the UK, you are receiving money in Naira and spending in Pounds that is one of the most unfair exchanges if there ever was any.

Again I repeat, if you can not help someone get better then don’t help them get worse with the words of your mouth.

oh and Christians?  next time you want to make a judgmental statement and wrap it up in the cloak of Christianity, remember the bible says:

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear”  

“I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

Finally, to everyone, let us learn to filter what we speak,type or let out of our heads generally and the best way to do this is by asking “will I want this said to me?”

Hopefully I have been able to convince you and not confuse you on why we all need to use FILTERS!

Yours Sincerely

Kike

Have a lovely weekend, Its good to be back!

P.S : Don’t forget to spread love and joy to someone today and remember a smile a day…keeps the worry away (Ok I made that up but its pretty good no?)

 

 

I Love Love

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I am an absolute SAP!!

I’ve watched something borrowed, the notebook, dear John and the Vow more times than I need to and now again, I just again watched “The Vow” and did I cry? Of course I did!

I guess you can say that I’m waiting for my own love story, you know, my own happy ever after.

Not exactly the wedding but the process to which I can then say that “I love this young man” some may say that I’m probably naïve or juvenile, that love doesn’t exist or in this day and age love isn’t a requirement for marriage and you know what? You may just be right for yourself and from your experiences, but I know what I want.

I want my Love to be EPIC! I want to love whomever I happen to love so deeply, my heart feels heavy when I miss him. I want to be in love with someone who loves me just as fiercely as I love him, no holds barred! I want a love that even after 50 years of being together we can still look at each other and love every new wrinkle that may have set in, the kind of love that is so set in God, nothing can shake it!

I want the kind of love that has no need for pretence nor games, I want a pure love, set up beautifully and built by us both.

I want a love that transcends religion, culture, tribe, economic background, social standing, education and family.

I want a love without interference from third parties, I want a love that allows both of us enjoy the discovery of ourselves, the good, the bad, the demented and even the unimaginable.

A love so strong, it will inspire other hearts to love, other hearts to give and basically heal the wounded.

A love so sweet, unique, soft and absolute

Hi I’m Kike and I’m addicted to the concept of love.

 

NB : happyNew year to every one, I pray everyone gets what they desire this year.

You know you love me.

xoxo

KT

I’m the hyena, what are you?

Model of the day: Fola Omotoso The mechanical engineer!!

Model of the day: Fola Omotoso
The mechanical engineer!!

Growing up was fun, we all had our fair shares of gaming to pass the time especially during the Long vacations.

Those were good times. Some of the popular games were whot, monopoly and the name game a.k.a name, animal, place, thing, food.

So I’ll just give a run through of some of the different types of gamers.

first we have the cheats who work their magic either by stealing monopoly notes (you know yourself) or hiding your cards and the worst generating words that you know are just stupid!! E.g giraffe meat for food when g is called upon.

Next we have the complainers, now this is that person who always laments when they are loosing, “there’s something wrong with the dice” “you didn’t shuffle the cards well, you put all the bad cards in one place” ” you counted too fast so I couldn’t finish writing out my stuff” sometimes they may even occasionally call in the cavalry “Mummy!! They are cheating in the game”

(Honestly I prefer the cheats to the complainers)

Then there’s the hyena, everything tickles them (this is me) their state in the game is not relevant all they do is laugh at everything which can get quite annoying at some point but hey..what’s life without laughter right? “Kike pick two” burst into laughter “I’m buying Mayfair” bursts into laughter ” I call on the letter Q” bursts into laughter. It is my belief that gaming excites me endlessly and I love the fact that I comes capped with enjoying other people’s company so here’s to us the hyenas of the game!!!

Which brings us to the overly serious gamers, that treat each game with precision and determination and focus like a doctor would treat a surgery. No laughter, no mercy, limited banter just straight up playing to kill, these are the ones who will hand you 3 pick 3s and 2 pick twos at the same time then add 2 general markets for everybody play a hold and check up without even cracking a smile. ( brutal)

It’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt and that someone is the sensitive one who then ups and quits the game(rolling my eyes!! They are the worst) in my experience they are already failing and have been on a bad streak for a while maybe chance sent them to jail or they don’t have enough cards to claim jackpot or they haven’t got and animal for X so they act all “I’m not even playing again.” Which can be super annoying.

Lastly but definitely not least, there were the normal people who gaming didn’t chsnge a thing about them, they weren’t overly competitive nor hyperactive from the thrill of the game.

Oh and just for a mention, we had the overly comoetitive category of people…we all know them.

Still, those were good times and it made for good memories I reckon.

I’m sure we all experienced this at some point with siblings or even friends, leave a comment below on what type of gamer you were and even if it wasn’t mentioned above tell it anyways.

See you next week. Thanks for reading😆😆💗💗💖💖

Birthday wishes!

To those who may not know, it was my birthday on Tuesday and for some reason sitting in my bed today, all I can think about is what was said to me a few years ago.

“at some point in your life kike, you are not going to care about the gifts that you get. You are simply going to be happy people remembered and cared enough to wish you well”  at 15 when I heard my aunt Tina say this to me I thought to myself “No way José, I am always going to care about my birthday gifts….”

Fast track to Friday last week and all I wanted for my birthday was to be happy and so, just like my aunt predicted It wasn’t about the gifts, it was about people celebrating with me.

Gifts come and go but words…They linger forever. And I have to say I must be an Ok person because the words that were used in association with my person was pretty awesome and made me feel like I was actually doing something good and wasn’t so much the selfish brat I used to be.

I realize days like birthdays that you begin to think about what you have achieved in the past year and if you have touched any life at all.

(This made me think that maybe I just might have )

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I was glad to know I had done something nice for at least two people and if I die today, I just might be satisfied with the woman I am turning out to be.

A huge thank you to Everyone who made my day special!💚💚💛💛💖💖💙💙And to the one who made the next day even more amazing, thank you!!😆😆😆

Family

 

Model of the week : The main, the greatest, the one, the only Papa T

Model of the week : The main, the greatest, the one, the only Papa T

Being a few thousand miles from home has made me realize how much it means to be a part of a family .

I remember when I couldn’t wait to get out of the house and now that i’m out, I miss it all. From making my mum and dad mad to sporadically jumping on them like a kangaroo. I even miss being called a kangaroo and half watching “football” with the family listening to dad shout at the Tv and last but certainly not least, I miss watching evening  shows with my mum and then personally entertaining her with my dancing to advert songs once they come on (Honeywell wheat meal was my favourite, it had its own dance incorporated😆😆😆) Oh and did I mention the hugs? forced or not, it was good stuff!!

Anyways this most darling friend of mine Seun Osho, master of words that he is, put together a poetic article on this very subject. Enjoy!

Family is the strongest bond known to man.

The religious call their God or god as the case maybe father, and one another brothers and sisters.

Friends endear themselves to one another by calling each other by family titles.

It’s human nature to identify the ones we proclaim love for with family titles like a sibling or cousin or father or mother.

Some have bastardised and casualised these titles, but that cannot degrade it’s meaning to those who realize what a wonderful thing it is to be loved as family.

The ones we truly love, we treat with affection and give our time and resources without hesitation because their comfort is important to us. We strive to understand them and work as hard as we can to overcome our shortcomings for their sake. We are concerned with their well being and listen to them, not just hear what they say. You don’t compare them to anyone or anything else because there is nothing and no one like the one you love.

Over time, if one doesn’t take time to appreciate all the good qualities that caused the love to blossom in the first place from time to time, we will lose sight of that love and we will not appreciate what has been set before us as a blessing, and like all unappreciated blessings, regrets will follow.

In love there is no dictatorship, there is no self, there is no tomorrow, there is no yesterday, there is only that person or people, and there is only this moment.

This moment in which you want to shower them with all the love in your heart because they matter more than everything else and now is all you have because you don’t know what’ll happen next.

But you definitely know what you want to remember and how you want to be remembered.

Don’t take family for granted.

Don’t forget where your true love should lie.

NB: Please go on Instagram to @redboxafrica’s page, follow them and like @ladelespeaks’ video. Muchos gracias.

Where are my shoes?

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First I would like to proffer my apology on the lateness of this post. Had a serious dose of writers block/ in-satisfaction. This one is dedicated to my brother, Happy Birthday in arrears to you Okanlawon and its only befitting I share a story about you.

The saying, what goes around comes back around never really stood out for me  in the first few years of my childhood, I was rude, spoilt and had an attitude problem. I got my sister in trouble just for the heck of it and felt no remorse for my actions (I was a terrible sibling)

Then all of a sudden my brother was getting me in trouble, and the worse part was his smiling face when “The parents” reprimanded me. it was unbelievable, I was being served my own medicine.

A distinct time was a clear sunday night, when he did something to me (for the life of me I cant remember what) but being the fast hand I was, I immediately gave him a good smack on the back of his head.

He didn’t budge, didn’t say anything,didn’t even try to tell on me to our parents, He just smiled and walked away( did I find this disturbing? Yes! did I then do anything about it? No!) it was my belief that once he slept for a few hours, he’d be over it (boy was I wrong).

Monday morning, and we were all getting ready to make the 7:30 mark. I got dressed but realized I was missing something, my school approved brown sandals,looking everywhere for it is an understatement as I searched high and low, then I stopped to think of where I may have put it and then I saw his face, smiling with an evil smirk that basically said “You’d never find where I hid them”

So I decided, I won’t let him get me late so I gave a little chic touch to my brown and cream uniform by pairing it with my Tres Chic pink sandals ( the next best thing I had) was I laughed at by my sister? Yes!! did I care?? No!!

I was going to rock my shoes with pride,provided the teachers didn’t see it and as it was just my lucky day that day…Mr Roland ( the mean, bad ass teacher) was on duty and yep he saw the shoes.

Maybe he was jealous or something as I decided to brighten the school Uniform but he ceased them from me and yours truly had to walk around school in her white socks looking like …

Anyways I got back home and there my original sandals were,placed where I had previously put them and my brother, he had on the most amazing smile that said “don’t try me again”

being me…you know I did

Mummy He broke my heart.

Osho Oluwaseun:Model of the day

Osho Oluwaseun:Model of the day

I believe everyone remembers their first heartbreak somehow,  the intensity of knowing someone isn’t yours to care for or about anymore.

All of a sudden, you become strangers and you can’t do anything to stop the distance that grows between you.

Mine was pretty much the same, Luke. So different, so sure of himself, didn’t need a pack of friends but was so bad ass he attracted people to him anyways.

Ours was destined to be a short lived romance but my little heart didn’t understand why. Two people who like each other surely have to be together, right?

I won’t bash his name for fear of a defamation of character lawsuit but the way things ended was not good enough for me. The worst part I think was moving on to another girl so soon, even if we both knew she was pure EVIL!!!

I wished my mummy would kiss my heart and make it better somehow, it always seemed to work when granny did it on my wounded body parts.

But I guess that’s what happens when you fall for the wrong person like Luke the blue ranger in Power Rangers time force.

#Foreverinmyheart